I’m Coach Jen, and over the years — from trading floors to boardrooms to stages — I’ve learned that how you fill silence says everything.

You know that moment when your brain races ahead and your mouth tries to keep up?
Cue: “Um, like, you know…”

We all do it. I’ve heard seasoned execs, startup founders, and Wall Street traders drop filler words like confetti. (Let’s be honest, I’ve, like, done it too.)

But when you learn to use your breath and pacing as your anchor, those fillers fade, and your voice sounds clear, grounded, and confident.

What you’ll learn:

Why fillers show up
How to speak with steadier pace and presence
How to use breath to strengthen your sound
How to swap “um” for intentional pauses
How to deliver clearer, shorter answers

Why do we fill the silence?

Filler words are natural. They show up when your brain needs a moment.

We have an instinct as humans to fill that void. When we’re nervous or thinking fast, our breath shortens. Air gets trapped in the chest. The mind panics: “Keep talking so no one notices I lost my place!” That’s how the ums, uhhhhs, likes, and rights sneak in.

Improvement comes from awareness and steady practice. Once you know what’s happening physiologically, you can re-train it.

For extra reading, here’s a breakdown of the science of filler words by the American Physiological Society, and this think-piece by Amanda Montell on why saying “like” can be a linguistic tool used by women to signal connection, identity, and social intelligence.

Step 1: Slow down so your brain can catch up.

When adrenaline hits, time feels faster than it is in reality.

Here’s your first move: slow the pace by 10%.

Take one breath per idea. End each sentence fully. Use a small pause after each thought. That’s where authority lives.

It feels slow to you, but it sounds calm and powerful to everyone else.

Step 2: Swap the filler for a pause.

A one-beat pause says: “I’m thinking, and I’m in control.” An “um” says: “I’m scrambling.”

Try this:

Record a 30-second voice memo answering a question like “What’s one thing I learned this week?”
Play it back and count your filler words.
Then re-record, adding a one-beat breath before every new sentence.
Compare the two versions. You’ll hear instant authority.

That one small pause changes everything.

Step 3: Breathe before you speak.

You can’t sound confident if you’re out of air. Use your breath as your natural amplifier.

Before each idea, inhale for four counts. Exhale on a soft sigh for six. Then speak your next sentence on that same exhale.

That’s how you sound measured instead of rushed.

Step 4: Practice shorter answers.

Filler words love rambling. Therefore, practice short, clear answers with a strong opening line.

Instead of: “Well, I just wanted to quickly add that maybe we could…”

Try: “Here’s one idea worth considering.”

Shorter, stronger, steadier.

(If you tend to over-explain, check out how to stop rambling.)

Step 5: Redefine success

Noticing your fillers is really an exercise in curiosity. When you hear yourself say “like” or “you know,” just note it. Don’t apologize.

The goal is a clear, grounded delivery that still feels like you. Pauses, warmth, and steadiness are what people trust.

Final word: Great speakers speak with focus and intention.

Great speakers pause where others rush, and they use silence to signal control. That’s what happens when you stop filling the air and start owning it.

Keep shining,

Coach Jen

🎤 Ready to ditch your filler words?

Practice with Speeko’s feedback tools to track your progress, or work live with one of Speeko’s expert coaches 1:1 to strengthen your presence. In your Vocal Transformation Session, you’ll work 1:1 with an expert coach to boost your confidence, clarity, and charisma. In just 45 minutes, you’ll transform how you sound and how you feel when you speak.

Book your Vocal Transformation Session →

So To Speak